Gum in My Hair

An embarrassingly honest blog

What the Font? March 11, 2009

Filed under: Shut Your Mouth! — dulcedementia @ 11:41 pm

I am somewhat of a font nerd. Yes, that’s right, I said font. I’m so into it that I can tell you almost any font just by looking at it, but I can name quite a few by site and I can tell you that, with the exception of Garamond, I prefer sans serif to serif fonts.


This obsession over fonts was developed and honed during 3 years in CU’s advertising department. I did so many font related drills that your head might start to spin if I started telling you all about them. But I loved those exercises. They were my favorite. The horrible side effect of all these drills was noticing what font was used on everything. That is when the seed of hatred for one particular font was planted.


Over the years, that seed has grown into a pretty robust fern and now I cringe every time I walk into an Acupuncture or Massage Therapy clinic or an All-Natural Grocer. I think some of you may already now the font I am talking about. If you don’t, I am speaking of the all pervasive font: Papyrus.




This. Font. Makes me so mad. It’s like drinking Bud Light Lime and calling your beer exotic. It’s like ordering lake trout at a coastal seafood restaurant. It’s like designing a room using earth tones and teal buffalo stencils and calling it “southwestern.” It’s like buying a monkey as a pet and then treating it like an actual child.


God help me. I hate this font. With the fires of a thousand suns and by the hammer of Thor, I hate this font.


I believe my analogies above accurately portray why I dislike this font so much, but in case that didn’t work, here’s why I dislike it: It’s fancy without using any imagination. It is the embodiment of what people use it for which is on business cards for massage therapy, aromatherapy, hand made soaps, Asian herbs and spices or any other mystic or natural product from the Orient. Seeing that font lets me know that they made their business cards in Microsoft Office. That font somehow cheapens things for me.


This is probably one of the only areas that I tend to get ridiculously elitist about, but I also have my guilty pleasures within the world of fonts.


*Looks around sneakily*


I absolutely adore Cooper Black.


Don’t you EVER tell ANYONE I told you that!


3 Responses to “What the Font?”

  1. Jason Says:


  2. Brad Example Says:

    Could be worse.

    Could be Comic Sans!

  3. mrs.smith Says:

    I was going to ask.
    You hate papyrus more than comic sans?
    not that it doesn’t deserve your ire, for all the reasons you listed.
    I’m just saying.
    (you’re welcome)

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